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Perfect Sense

Cheque please - ★

“Fat and Flour” says the owner of Ewan McGregor’s restaurant, this is what people will live on if all their senses go and this movie is the equivalent.

Perfect Sense is the story of an unknown disease that robs people of their senses set against the love story between Eva Green, an epidemiologist trying to find the cause and Ewan Mc Gregor a head chef whose whole life revolves around smell, taste and texture. I believed trolls lived in the forests of Norway and a planet by the name of Melancholia was passing by Earth but I could not believe for one moment that a mysterious illness was robbing people of their senses just after they experienced intense feelings of sorrow or rage.

It wasn’t until about half way through that I realised why I couldn’t become absorbed or get swept away and it was because of the still images from around the world of people with their loved ones. This film is one giant Hallmark card, it’s fake, phony and shallow. The relationship between Eva and Ewan is so lacking in chemistry and saccharine it’s beyond belief and we are constantly being hit over the head with such intense emotions that when acted out are hammier than a pig eating bacon.

Like a bad restaurant it doesn’t know what it’s about, for starters we have the predictable love story between two people with baggage but together they’ll become whole, then for the main it’s a standard end of the world apocalypse yarn and all the sides that go along with it and finally for desert it’s back to the sickly sweet love story all the while a troupe of violinists plays to intensify the whole affair just in case you weren’t getting it. Oh and to make matters worse Eva Green takes on the role of a waitress who won’t leave you in peace with her infuriating voice over.

The idea of the film is good and if it had have stuck to the one speciality it would have been a more enjoyable experience instead of leaving a sour taste in my mouth.